Forgiveness…

It’s really about you…to set your heart free.

Sometimes it doesn’t seem possible, maybe complicated and confusing. Let’s take a look at why we forgive and what forgiveness really looks like.

Colossians 3:13 “Bear with each other and forgive one another. If any of you has a grievance against someone, forgive as the Lord forgave you.”

Ephesians 4:32 “Be kind to one another, tender hearted, forgiving one another, just as God, through Christ, has forgiven you.”

First and most importantly, forgiveness is an act of obedience. God commands us to forgive as he has forgiven us. He wants us to forgive so we can find healing.

Sometimes unforgiveness can feel like the best way to protect our hearts from further hurt. I get it!

But unforgiveness never leads to peace! Resentment and bitterness will quickly take root in us. It just does!

Hebrews 12:15 “See to it that no one fails to obtain the grace of God; that no “root of bitterness” - springs up and causes trouble - and by it many become defiled.”

We are missing out on so much when we stay in unforgiveness!

So how do we forgive when it feels so hard?

Forgiveness is a Decision and a Process. We make a decision to forgive the fact of what happened, out of obedience to set your heart free. You don’t have to feel like it. Just do it. Once we forgive, we begin the healing process. Healing will not take place without forgiveness.

*Our ability to heal cannot be conditional on someone wanting or asking for forgiveness. It’s about our willingness to give it.

*Our ability to heal cannot be conditional on others receiving consequences or punishment for their disobedience. It’s about our obedience to trust God’s justice - whether we ever see it or not.

*Forgiveness doesn’t minimize what happened.

*Forgiveness is not forgetting what happened.

Someone may say to you, I thought you forgave me. Why do you keep bringing this up? Why can’t you just get over it? Questioning your forgiveness.

Maybe you bring things up because things have not been resolved, the behaviors continue or you still feel hurt.

This does NOT mean you have not forgiven. Remember, forgiving is an act of obedience between you and God to set your heart free. Don’t let anyone take that away from you!

The reality is, we may not forget. God wants to bring healing in our hearts so we can remember without the pain.

Sometimes people carry their own shame and have a hard time feeling worthy of forgiveness and can’t receive it. That is not on you. That just means they have their own work and healing to do.

It’s a process! Our job is to be kind and to forgive others as God has forgiven us.

Ephesians 1:7-8 “In Him we have redemption through His blood, for the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God’s grace that has He lavished on us.”

Is there someone you need to forgive? Someone who has hurt you, betrayed you or caused you pain? Forgive. Be willing and obedient to God so your heart can be free.

Maybe it’s you, yourself you need to forgive. Are you holding on to past regrets or shame? You are not alone. The devil loves to remind us of our past mistakes because it keeps us stuck. Be kind to yourself, forgive yourself so that you can move forward into all that God has for you.

Forgive, as God has forgiven you.

The best part is, when we forgive, we become more like Jesus.

If you are struggling with forgiveness, please reach out privately on the contact page. I’d love to talk with you. :)

Bonnie