The Dangers of Fiction Romance

Romance novels and movies act as a form of addictive media according to recent studies.

They offer an escapist driven high that parallels the effect of porn.

Have you heard the statement, “Men watch porn, women read it?” Pornography is widely considered a man’s market. It caters primarily to men with the content often prioritizing male pleasure above all else.

On the flip side, romantic and sexual literature is marketed more for women. It’s often more sensual and romantic than traditional porn. Because it does not contain pictures and videos, it is easily shrugged off as harmless.

You may say, “Well my romance novels aren’t that bad!” But, what seems so innocent at first, can become harmful. I know ladies, this is a tough one but we need to pay attention to this.

Women read romance novels to escape from their daily living. Studies show that romance novels and movies lead to unrealistic expectations for real life relationships and sexual experiences. Much like porn or other forms of fantasy, it is self gratification. There is a dopamine rush that keeps you going back for more, and more often means juicier. Authors and producers will offer what sells. Novels, like movies are getting darker; more sexual and violent.

The number of women becoming sexually addicted is rising at a fast pace. Many admit it started with romance novels, often at an early age. Teens have a tough time discerning reality from fantasy. Although the content they are reading is fictional, the impact is very real. For young girls, consuming this content can make them feel like they “don’t deserve” relationships. It adds unnecessary anxiety about sex and relationships, can cause face and body obsession and increased insecurity.

Adult women admit to experiencing high levels of distress and disruption in their lives due to the fantasizing and sexual thoughts or actions from their fiction reads, which often leads to depression and/or secondary addictions. The addiction to romance desensitizes readers to unhealthy relationships, sexual activity, violence, and abuse.

Proverbs 4:23 says, “Above all else, guard your heart. For everything you do flows from it.”

We are to fill our hearts with God’s truth and be careful to live according to it. There is a direct connection between our hearts and our behavior. If we guard our hearts we guard our actions. When we have foolishness and lies in our hearts it will lead to unhealthy behavior and sin.

Let’s be more conscious about what we are allowing into our hearts and our minds. 

Philippians 4:8  “Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovey, whatever is admirable - if anything is excellent or praiseworthy – think about such things.”

If any of this resonates with you, please know there is no shame in admitting it. You are not alone! Removing stigma around any form of sexual intimacy issues or addictions is the first step to treating it.

Guard your heart and fill it with God’s love!

Be blessed,

Bonnie

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